Holding your identity lightly is a gift to yourself. The phrase is Julia Galef’s. Once a belief becomes part of who you are, she argues, it gets harder to change. Paul Graham made the same point in 2009, in an essay called Keep Your Identity Small. “The more labels you have for yourself, the dumber they make you.”
A light grip keeps the mind flexible, unbound by labels or roles, and free to follow evidence wherever it leads. It is the fix for a problem I have described elsewhere. A belief sticks to identity like velcro, and whole societies read facts through it.
It is good for you in another way. Psychologists count the ability to shift mindsets, while staying true to deeply held values, as a basic part of health.
It also changes how a conversation goes. People can tell when you are trying to understand and not to win, and views offered that way land more peacefully. Galef adds a surprise: a light grip can help activism too. That matches my own rule about working with imperfect allies. Who Opened the Door applies it to Latinos and the civil-rights debt.
None of this means standing for nothing. I stand for a few things and mean to keep them. The labels are what I hold lightly. The values I hold firmly.